Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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