brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
