Where is the hickey?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
