K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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