Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
do nipples grow back?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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