No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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