i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
