Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Randomize
