Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
