if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
