Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
That accounts for only three of the penises
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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