just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
