This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Randomize
