dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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