she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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