nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
