I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
