I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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