Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
its not stalking. its research.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
