love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?�
Randomize