were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
last night I used snow as a chaser
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