just come out here and I will go home with you...
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
