This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Randomize
