But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
