while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
