Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
