That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize
