I puked a lego.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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