Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
