I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Randomize
