I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
