we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
