Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
