i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
