please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
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