She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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