I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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