we're blogging at a bar
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
