Sry I called you an 8
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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