This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize