Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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