1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
