I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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