After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
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