Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Randomize
