IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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