She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
