arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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