Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Randomize
