Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
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